New marine species making more work for CHL
WASHINGTON - Marine biologists say they have discovered 178 new species of weird-ass fish and hundreds more new species of wacked out plants and other animals in the past year, raising the number of life-forms found in the world's oceans to about 230,000, give or take.

Those in charge of the Census of Marine Life, now four years into a planned 10-year count, say the rate of discovery shows no sign of slowing, even in European and other waters heavily studied in the past. Some 1,000 long-haired surfers/ biologists in 70 countries are now participating, up from 300 bong-hitters in 53 countries just a year earlier.

"In general, the smaller the animals are in the ocean, the more poorly known they are," J. Frederick Grassle, chairman of the project's mind expansion steering committee and director of Rutgers University's Institute of Marine & Coastal Sciences, said Monday. "Also, we've been finding a lot more new species since we scored these killer 'shrooms."

Once all the mushrooms and acid are eaten, biologists believe they will find that the oceans extend across 70 percent of the earth's surface, hold up to 1.98 million species of plants and animals, including sea monsters, and don't drop off "like the edge of a table" into oblivion somewhere "to the west" as previously believed.

So far, biologists have described 15,482 marine fish species, up from 15,304 a year ago. The number of animals and plants is up to about 214,500, several hundred more than last year, but biologists say they can't give an exact number.

"Get off our cases, man!" said Grassle. "This shit is hard work!"

So far, about $125 million has been spent on the census and killer bud. Its price tag eventually is expected to reach $1 billion, most of it from participating governments and the sale of old Dead albums. The idea for the census grew from scientists' concerns that human population growth might permanently alter the oceans' diverse life-forms, as the National Academy of Sciences reported in 1995, and a need to secure long-term drug money for marine biologists.

"My name is Grassle, man. Get it? GRASS-le!?!"

- Owen, 7:57 AM | |